his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
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