I wish I only lived at night.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
