Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
What drink are we having for lunch?
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Randomize
