As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
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