you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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