how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
