protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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