just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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