epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
