I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Randomize
