So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
