the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
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