I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
