and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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