Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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