Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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