So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
