Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
