apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize
