i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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