how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
