I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
