you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize
