I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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