Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
