I wanna passion pit in your ass
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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