Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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