kristin has been a bad kristin
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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