And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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