True but thats because hes a fetus.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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