i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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