I heard we made out
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
