we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
3pm strippers are depressing
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
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