real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
