Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
