Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
