at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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