I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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