Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
oh god was she eating orange peels again
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
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