I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I forgot how hot balto sounded
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize