Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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