My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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