like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
