You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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