I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
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