Buhtt sex?
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize