my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
