how can u be prego again
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
