is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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