Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
