I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
