Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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