In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
